What Your First Email Should Look Like

If your profile is one of the most important components to getting you laid, your first email can (unfortunately) be one of the things that keeps you from getting a woman into bed.

However, it’s the only way you’re ever going to get a woman there—she can’t say “yes” to you if she doesn’t know who you are, and you’re never going to get very many unsolicited emails from women. Sorry, but that’s the way the game is played. The first dating message on an extramarital site is pretty much your only way to meet a married woman.

Make it count.

There are a few things that MUST be in any first email that you send. Without these few things, you’re completely screwed when it comes to getting any sort of a response.

Make your first email a short one.

Don’t forget that no woman wants an unsolicited life story. We don’t care how fascinating you think your life story is—women might find it fascinating too, but you have to give them a chance to ask for it. Otherwise, you’re the asshole who won’t shut up.

If you send a long, drawn-out email as your first contact, this woman is already going to be imagining trying to get a word in edgewise to you at the dinner table. She’s not going to want to go on that date, since you can’t be trusted to be good company.

If you keep it short and to the point, however, she’s going to be much more willing to give you another chance. Remember, you want her to ask to know more. You don’t want her to wish she could ask to know less.

Leave it at the first email.

First dating emails are tricky. They’re even more frightening if you don’t know exactly how well a certain site works as far as their messaging system goes, since many aren’t all that good.

If you think your email didn’t go through, move on. It’s better to never message a woman than to send her two emails. At least if she never gets your message, there’s a very slim chance that she’ll stumble across your profile on her own and decide to message you.

If you send her several emails, on the other hand, you run no chance of her ever going out with you. Women aren’t fond of being pressured. This goes double or triple for women on married dating sites. With very few exceptions, the women on these sites are looking to escape from the demands of being married, and they don’t want any more pressure.

You don’t want to look desperate.

A desperate man is a huge turn-off—for any woman, at any time. That’s just simply not what women are looking for. Remember, these are women that aren’t unable to get a man for some reason. They already have men at home. That’s the good thing about dating married people; they have more to lose, and they have, essentially, proven credentials.

There are several key elements to first dating emails.

Here are the things that need to be in the first dating email that you send out to a woman:

A short greeting based on her name (Hi, Angie. Hi, Kayla. Hey, Denise. How are you, Carla?)
What first drew you to her? Don’t make it focused on her appearance, unless it’s her eyes or her smile. She doesn’t want to hear about how she has great thighs or a huge rack—she can hear that from walking down any street.
Where you’d like this discussion to go—is this a friendship request? Do you want to hear more about her? Are you asking her a question? Make sure to give her a reason to respond.

If you can get these three things right, you’re going to be very successful at sending out your emails. They don’t have to be stressful if you know what you’re doing, and it can definitely get you the women that you’ve always wanted to go out with.